December well-being: Supporting children through Christmas

Christmas is often painted as the most magical time of year, especially for children. Twinkling lights, festive films, piles of presents, and joyful family gatherings dominate our cultural picture of December. Yet beneath the sparkle lies a far more complicated reality for many families.

December brings a perfect storm of challenges for young people’s well-being: end-of-term exhaustion, flu season, disrupted routines, and intense pressure to meet festive expectations.

Understanding how to support your child through this demanding period is crucial – and often means letting go of perfection altogether.

The December reality check

By the time Christmas arrives, most children are running on empty. They’ve completed a full autumn term – often the longest and most demanding of the school year – managing academic pressures, social challenges, extracurricular activities, and the emotional impact of darker, colder days. December alone adds school performances, Christmas jumper days, class parties, assessments, and the push to “finish strong” before the holidays.

At the same time, flu season reaches its peak. Schools become breeding grounds for illness, with coughs, colds, and viruses circulating rapidly. Even if your child doesn’t become ill, their immune system may be working overtime, leaving them more tired, emotionally fragile, and less able to cope with stress.

Yet this is precisely when we expect children to be at their most joyful, grateful, and well-behaved. They’re asked to cope with extra stimulation, social demands, and excitement while already depleted. It’s no surprise that so many children struggle in December.

Recognising end-of-term burnout

Child burnout is very real, though it often goes unrecognised. After months of early mornings, school expectations, and busy schedules, children can become genuinely exhausted – not just physically, but emotionally and mentally too.

Common signs of burnout in children include:

• increased irritability or frequent meltdowns over small issues

• difficulty concentrating or completing tasks they usually manage

• loss of interest in activities they normally enjoy

• changes in sleep patterns, including trouble falling asleep or waking up 

• physical complaints such as headaches or tummy aches

• emotional fragility, crying more easily or seeming constantly “on edge”

• withdrawal from social interaction 

• regression in behaviour, such as clinginess or younger coping patterns

  
  

If your child seems “off” in December, they’re probably not being difficult – they’re depleted. Their emotional tank is empty, and we’re asking them to summon enthusiasm for even more stimulation and expectation.

The illness factor

Flu season peaks in December and January, meaning many children are ill, recovering from illness, or fighting off infection throughout the festive period. Even mild illness drains energy and affects mood, attention, and emotional regulation.

Illness can also create anxiety. Missing school brings worries about catching up on work, missing friends, or falling behind. Children often return to school before they’re fully recovered, pushing through when their bodies are still asking for rest. This combination of pressure and physical depletion can make emotional regulation extremely difficult.

Modelling rest and regulation

Here’s a truth many parenting articles won’t tell you: one of the best things you can do for your child’s well-being in December is to look after your own. Children are extraordinary observers. They notice when you’re running on empty, skipping meals, staying up late wrapping presents, or pushing through exhaustion to create “perfect” memories.

When you model rest, you give your child permission to rest too. Say it out loud: “I’m feeling tired, so I’m going to sit down with a cup of tea for ten minutes.” This teaches children that listening to their bodies is normal and sensible.

Model emotional regulation by naming your feelings and showing healthy coping strategies. “I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the preparations, so I’m going to take a few deep breaths,” teaches far more than lectures ever could. When you cancel plans because you need a quiet day, you demonstrate that rest isn’t lazy – it’s essential.

Understanding interoception and body awareness

Interoception is our ability to sense what’s happening inside our bodies – hunger, tiredness, a racing heart, or butterflies in our tummy. Many children struggle to identify these internal signals, especially when they’re unwell, overtired, or overwhelmed.

During the festive period, help your child tune into their body’s messages. Ask gentle questions such as: “How does your tummy feel right now?” or “Does your body feel heavy or buzzy today?” This builds awareness of how physical sensations connect to emotions and energy levels.

You might create a simple daily check-in: “Let’s notice – are we hungry, tired, or needing some quiet time?” This isn’t about controlling feelings but helping children recognise and respond to their needs. A child who can say, “I’m cross because I’m tired and hungry,” is developing vital emotional intelligence.

The sensory experience of Christmas

Christmas is a sensory explosion. Flashing lights, loud music, unfamiliar foods, scratchy clothes, strong smells, excited voices, and physical affection from relatives can quickly become overwhelming – especially for children who are already depleted or recovering from illness.

• Visual: Softer lighting can reduce overstimulation. Not every room needs to be lit up at once.

• Auditory: Constant background music and television add up. Build in genuine quiet periods.

• Tactile: New clothes can feel uncomfortable. Let children wear familiar, soft clothing whenever possible.

• Taste and smell: Strong scents and rich foods can be overwhelming. Offer familiar, plain options alongside festive food.

• Movement: Children need movement to regulate. A walk, dancing, or outdoor play can help release pent-up energy.

Creating calm in the chaos

Protect sleep above all else. Sleep is non-negotiable when children are burnt out or fighting illness. Keep bedtimes consistent where possible. An overtired child cannot enjoy Christmas, no matter how magical it’s meant to be.

Building in proper downtime is also advisable. Resist the urge to fill every day with activities. Burnt-out children need slow, quiet days to recover. Time in pyjamas reading, drawing, or watching a familiar film may be far more restorative than another outing.

Respect recovery time, too. If your child has been ill, remember recovery is gradual. Even once symptoms fade, they may need extra patience and low-key days.

Managing expectations (and letting them go)

When children are depleted, they cannot meet the emotional expectations we often place on them. They may seem ungrateful, withdrawn, or irritable – not because they are spoiled, but because they have nothing left to give.

Manage your own expectations alongside theirs. Your child doesn’t need the perfect Christmas morning – they need you calm, present, and emotionally available. Mixed feelings about Christmas are normal, and it’s OK if excitement sits alongside tiredness or overwhelm.

Permission to do Christmas differently

Christmas Day itself can be intense. Create a calm retreat space where your child can take breaks without judgment. Let them step away when needed.

You’re allowed to adapt traditions. You’re allowed to say no. You’re allowed to prioritise well-being over appearances. Christmas does not have to look like anyone else’s to be meaningful.

The most valuable gift you can offer your child this December isn’t wrapped or bought. It’s your calm, grounded presence. When you slow down, set boundaries, and accept imperfection, you teach your child that their wellbeing matters more than performance.

The bottom line

December is hard. End-of-term exhaustion, illness, sensory overload, and festive pressure create a genuinely challenging environment for children’s mental health. Your child isn’t being difficult – they’re depleted. And you’re not failing – you’re navigating an impossible set of expectations with care and love.

A calmer, gentler Christmas might not look as magical from the outside, but for a tired child, it can be exactly what they need most.